As of yet, nobody has asked me any questions. If they did, it would probably go something like this:

Q: Why don’t you capitalize your name? A: Because I am impersonating e.e. cummings.

Q: Are you a runner? A: No. Sometimes I run, because I like to, but I don’t go very far or fast and I certainly don’t race.

Q: Are you a vegetarian? A: It depends. Who’s asking? No, really. I usually say that I’m a vegetarian, just to make things easier at dinner parties and restaurants, but I regularly eat dairy, eggs, and honey, and on occasion will eat – gasp – flesh. The chances of me eating that flesh are dramatically increased if I know the person who raised the animal and/or killed it. If somebody slaughters a goat for me, you can bet I’m eating it.

Q: Is that all? A: Not quite. My philosophy regarding dairy and eggs is basically, “If there is a better alternative, I will eat that instead.” Some things do not have good (palatable and natural) alternatives – like cheese. So I eat cheese (mainly from small farms) and eggs (only from small farms.) I do not drink cow’s milk, though I will sometimes use cream when cooking. And I eat butter, not any weird butter substitutes.

Q: What’s with all the funny vegetables? A: I get a box of produce delivered weekly by a wonderful man from a farm. Sometimes this means I get a box of celeriac, rutabaga, and parsnips. It’s exciting, and a little scary. I don’t much like celeriac.

Q: Seriously, why no pictures? A: Because when I’m looking at a plate of food, I want to eat it, not photograph it. Really! Maybe, someday, if I post recipes, I will include pictures with those, but not when I post things like, “Woke up. Ate weetabix.”

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